There's More To It Than R.E.M.

You were always a truer R.E.M. fan than me.

What do you mean? We both love R.E.M.

Yeah, but when I was listening to Document you were listening to Reckoning.

Yeah?

And when I was buying Automatic you were buying Dead Letter Office.

So?

And when I was talking about “What’s the Frequency, Kenneth?” you were talking about “Perfect Circle.”

So?

And when I left for a couple years there you were playing “How the West Was Won And Where It Got Us” for me as soon as I got back in 1997; telling me how good it was.

Okay.

And then I didn’t even buy New Adventures In Hi-Fi until early 2000!

Yeah?

And then I completely loved it and I called and told you how great it was and you just said, “Yeah, man, it is great!”

So what?

So you should’ve said, “No kidding, dumbass, I told you about it three years ago!”

No.

Yes. And sometimes when I say, “I don’t know if I even like Up through Around the Sun except for the song ‘Reveal’,” or “Sometimes R.E.M. bore the hell out of me,” you just laugh and say something great about them.

Whatever, man.

And that one time when you came from out of state to visit us after we had our first kid and we got out of the house to go to the grocery store or something and on the way back to my place you pulled over and played parts of Up for me before I had even bought Up.

Why does it matter?

I don’t know. I’ve just always talked about how much I love R.E.M. and everything but there you are the truest R.E.M. fan in the world, you know?

No way, man.

Yeah. I think so.

Why does it even matter? There’s more to life than R.E.M.

Exactly. That’s exactly it.